I revisited my old self again.

I saw her in our bedroom, she's hugging her pillow after kicking a huge plushie off the bed. 

Her long, black hair was in a bun - as usual. She was silently scrolling on her phone and didn't get up until it was noon. Well, like always, she'll definitely regret it in a bit once her head starts pounding. But we can't really blame her, she got off late from work. again. 

She was quiet but during this time, there's about thousands of thoughts that's been bugging her, thousands of questions that were left hanging and thousands of items to work on. 

If I could turn back time (and not scare my old self for popping out of the blue), I'd comfort her and tell her the things I know now.

It was a tough time. I know, I've been there. (Very funny.)

I was in the office again today,

I had a glimpse of what happened and how I was back then. And funny enough, the weather was also gloomy. 

There were visible differences though. Like... well... I wasn't as busy and drained as before (is it a yay or a nay?), my hair is currently gray-fading-into-blonde (again hehe), and I feel free and calmer now. 

My old self forgot a lot of things, or maybe it was shoved in the back of her mind. But I guess I can now say that she was quite optimistic - even at the worst times; she was someone who always fought and hoped for the best. 

Back then, I almost lost my colors and my "muchiness" (as Alice and the Mad Hatter talked about in the movie), I almost lost my voice and I lost focus on what matters more.

Regardless of age, I wrote so much about what's currently going on in my life. I get to see things differently as time passes; I get to laugh at a loooot of dumb moments or maybe get upset about how I realized most things a bit late. (As the saying goes, "Better late than never".) 

I had a looooot of rewiring to do; a lot of things I had to unlearn, things I had to drop and let go, thoughts to ignore, dates to erase, comments and opinions to shake off, and some other things that I now consider "nonsense". 

I've talked to people. I've talked to strangers. I've heard about some things and I've dreamt about some other stuff. (Yup, talk about strange coincidences.)

And I realized... that's how it is.

The answers I was looking for were always in front of me. 

The dedication I have for growth and my desire to learn were also always here; I just didn't have to listen to that voice. I didn't have to trust the twisted words and to take it straight to heart, like they wanted me to.

I still rant a lot. I talk/write a lot. Hence the lengthy posts. 

I get to enjoy (and experience) the things I loved and hoped for when I was younger. I get to enjoy moments with others.

I still get to dream more and live life. I'm even more open to try a lot of things lately. (Anyone wanna try scuba diving? lol) (Kidding aside, I also really wanna try solo traveling.)

I'm looking forward to what the next few weeks, months, or year(s) has in store for me.

But ah... Finally free. 

Finally clean. 

I've been pretty busy these days. I almost forgot about this blog post. But I am not going to apologize for the late post. Hahaha!

Oh look! My old blog name came true! Hahaha.

A few days ago, I went on an adventure with my mom.
On our first adventure, we searched a house/dorm for my sister who is currently working in Manila. We almost got lost because the streets are really confusing. You'll be seeing streets like "7th-9th street" then "4th-6th street." It's really confusing.

I did something stupid while we were in Manila.
As we walk, we look for some flyers/signs like "Room for Rent" and "House for Rent". It was almost 10 AM when a taho vendor passed by. We stopped for a moment just to finish our taho. After that, we continued searching. I was talking to my mom as we walk; I think I was babbling about how tired I was and how confusing the streets were. My mom stopped and looked at the pink house which was located at the left side of the street. I looked at it as well and continued walking or should I say. . . . falling? Hahaha! Yes, I did fall. I didn't notice that the floor that we were walking on is not straight or whatever you call it. I think my ankle did a "plot twist." *drum solo* Okay. That was a lame joke. But yes, it did a little twist, and I landed with a sitting position. Weird right?